Meet the Cudham Wyse players. If you're a member and you're not
pictured, it's not because I don't like you, it's because I don't have
your photo - so send me one!
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Hari Akkineni: A new signing for 2011, Hari is making a name
for himself in the club with his array of improvised shots in
the middle order. Having honed his skills in India in the
shorter forms of the game, he's hoping that playing for the Wyse
1st XI will raise his asking price for the next auction of the
IPL. |
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Rezwan Alauddin: A stylish batsman with a flourishing cover
drive, Bangladesh-born Rezwan joined the club in 2010 and made
an immediate impact for the 1st XI, scoring 78 to win a game
against Horsmonden. Although he didn't score as highly for the
rest of the season he will be looking to get back to top form in
2011. |
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Mark Archer: Mark's nifty glovework has made him the regular
Sunday keeper and he is sometimes persuaded to show off his
skills on a Saturday as well. Particularly adept at keeping to
spin, he is the only player in the club who has unpicked the
mysteries of Alex's balls. |
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Mark Aston: Mark is now in his third season with CWCC, and
is known for his accurate and steady seam bowling which tempts
the batsmen into making a mistake. He's also one of the club's
brainiest members and is famed for his cricket-related poetry. |
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Chris Barnes: Chris is one of the club's premier batsmen and
enjoys batting all day, as shown by his career-best 144 not out
in 2008. The innings was only ended when his kids had to come
in from the back garden for their tea. Only joking - it was
against Otford. |
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John Beames: A swashbuckling batsman whose quick running
between the wickets has become legendary in his 30-year Wyse
career, the silver fox is enjoying a new lease of life as second
team captain, and 2011 will be his third consecutive year at
the helm. |
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James Brockett: With pace, accuracy, fielding and batting
ability, good looks, sex appeal and popularity, this lad has got
it all - including control of the website and the ability to
write his own profile. Muhahahaha!! |
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Russell Brockett: Despite enjoying the red wine a bit too
much (see picture), Lord Brockett made an unlikely comeback from
retirement in 2009 and continues to blag the odd game for the 2nds. In his
day he was one of the village scene's most fearsome fast
bowlers. |
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Ryan Brooks: An aggressive left handed opening bat and
wicketkeeper, Ryan often sets the tone for CWCC's 1st XI
with speedy contributions up the order. Shropshire boy Ryan is
also responsible for setting up the club's popular annual tour to his native county,
where he always manages to score lots of runs. |
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Andy Burnham: The fun-loving accountant is a club legend for
wholehearted contributions with bat, ball and pint glass. Could this picture be evidence
that he has decided to take up fishing this summer instead? We
hope not! |
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Ian Burnham: The lofty opener has forged a reputation as a
'barnacle' with several gritty innings in Sunday matches marking
him out as a hard man to dismiss. His rubber limbs also make him
a man to watch in the field and he is a former recipient
of the
fielding award. |
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Tom Carter: Left-handed batsman Tom had a great time of it
in 2010,
scoring 788 runs and making four fifties. A key man for the 2nds,
he also made the first team on several occasions. His bucket
hands make him one of the club's most reliable catchers. |
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Keith Catchpole: Former captain Keith now lives in the USA,
but on his occasional trips back home makes every effort to take
the field for CWCC. In his regular playing days he was
responsible for a host of innovations at the club, from
helmet-wearing to the practice of shouting loudly before taking
a catch. |
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Ben Charman: All-rounder Ben has graduated through the ranks
of the CWCC colts, most recently as captain of the U15 team, and
now makes regular appearances for the senior 2nd XI mainly
playing as a bowler. He won the Most Improved Player award in
2011 and is a hot prospect for the future. |
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Seemab Cheema: Pace bowler Seemab previously enjoyed success
with Cudham CC, but 2011 was his first full season with Wyse and
he made a big impression, striking terror into the heart of many
an opposition line-up. We're hoping for more quick stuff from
him in 2012. |
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Julian Dobbs: Jules is a big lad who hits the ball hard and
bowls it fast. I would write something cheeky about him, but I'm
too scared. Took the award for Outstanding Sunday Player in
2010. |
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Leon Du Platel: He's a man of many talents: As well as being
a successful singer, Leon is a tennis coach who has rubbed
shoulders with some of the top pros. (Just shoulders? Ed.)
On the cricket field he always makes a racket and can be relied
upon to net a big score. As social secretary, he also organises
a good knees-up. |
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Stuart Gardner: Is that Johnny Depp or Adam Ant? Nope, it's
Mr Gardner. Stu has established himself as the club's
utility player, with his off spin, big hitting batting in the
middle order and dynamic fielding. The recipient of the best
injury of the season, a bruised thigh after being stepped on by
a stiletto (no further details supplied). |
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Dave Godden: The rugby-playing hard man has broken every
bone in his body but still gets on to a cricket field
occasionally. Once there, he tries his best to get injured
further with his sledging and suicidal fielding. |
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Mansoor Hafeez: Mansoor had a brilliant year with the bat in
2010, scoring 1229 runs with nine fifties and one hundred, and
was at his free-scoring best at the top of the order. A
multi-faceted player, he also keeps wicket when required and
bowls handy off-spin. |
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Danny Heselden: The enigmatic opener is Cudham's own version
of Marcus Trescothick, combining explosive hitting at the top of
the order with an alarming tendency to go missing when it all
gets too much. Has not been seen for a couple of seasons, but
I'm not deleting his profile in the hope he'll come back soon! |
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Pete Ingrey: Paceman Pete has been a terror to batsmen for
many years, slinging the ball down fast and aggressively in the
mid-80s. Unfortunately that's the 1980s rather than 80 mph...
but he's still a more than handy player! |
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Paul Inwood: Wicketkeeper Paul is known for his wholehearted
appealing, feisty glovework and ability to annoy the opposition.
Off the pitch he is a reclusive man of few words and likes
nothing better than to curl up on the sofa in an evening with a
bag of pork scratchings. |
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Mike Kelson: Don't be fooled by the long hair, boyish good
looks and the fact that he is the lead singer in a rock band.
Mike is actually a middle-aged vegetarian from Biggin Hill. |
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Len Kirby: After being a fine CWCC bowler for more than a
quarter of a century, Len has hung up his playing boots but is
still a regular sight on a Saturday as our meticulous club
scorer. I'm not sure about the point of all those colour pens,
but they sure look pretty. |
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Phil Knight: Has anybody seen this man? He was last spotted
in the Sevenoaks area terrorising people at cricket nets, and is
also a well-known e-mail pest. If any club members see him near
a cricket pitch with a bat in his hand, please call
0800-698-WHEREISPHIL |
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Bobby Levy: Bobby is an intimidating opponent, with the
physique of a basketball player and the ability to deliver the
ball from around 9ft. But by the time it reaches the batsman
it's normally about 6ft off the ground, which is ideal. |
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Sam Merron: Big hitting Sam doesn't mess around at the
crease and can be relied upon to lift the tempo of a run chase.
It's no coincidence that he likes an early finish, as he always
has a party to get to after the game. |
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Paul Messenger: Former fast bowler Paul is best known these
days as the supremo of Cudham's youth set-up, having
masterminded the growth and success of the club's colts section.
Also known for his feisty contributions at committee meetings. |
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Graham Mills: Graham has a long-standing reputation as
Cudham's best fielder and wildest hitter. His arrival at the
wicket always brings a smile to the face as spectators play 'Millsy
bingo' and try to guess which ball of the over will be slogged
at. |
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Marc Ollis: An accurate medium-pacer, Marc burst on to the
scene in 2009 with six wickets in his first game for the club
against Brenchley. Didn't play many games in 2010 as he spent
his summer on an epic cycling trip. At least now he should be
nice and fit for 2011. |
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Shuaib Rabbani: All-rounder Shuaib is an ace in the pack for
Wyse's first XI, and can always be relied on to keep a cool head
whether batting in the closing overs or bowling fast yorkers at
the end of an innings. This is his second year as 1st XI captain. |
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Bharath Rajamani: Bharath is a talented
off-spinner who is recognisable by his deafening primal scream
wicket celebrations. Away from cricket, he enjoys travelling,
listening to Pink Floyd and dressing up in funny outfits (see
left).
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Eric Rayfield: Veteran spinner Eric is Cudham's all time
highest wicket-taker, with more than 900 scalps, and continues
to give the club a quality slow bowling option with his craft
and guile. As team secretary he is also a tireless club man off
the field. |
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John Rayfield: The holder of the club record score of 158,
and the scorer of six centuries in the last two years, John is a
fearsome batsman and we only let him play half a dozen times a
year, because otherwise it wouldn't be fair on the opposition. |
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David Rees: An athletic fast bowler who is also the
brainiest player in the squad, 'The Prof' is advancing in years
but is still at his peak in both mind in body! An example to all
of us. |
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Simon Richards: Veteran tweaker Simon is 7th on CWCC's
all-time list of of bowlers with over 540 wickets. Specialises
in lulling batsmen into injudicious shots, especially with his
infamous 'doorknob' delivery. |
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Dave Rippingale: A stalwart of Cudham CC, Dave has had a
long and fruitful career as a top-order batsman, and now he's
joined the Wysemen is vice-captain of the second XI. He is
also the lead singer of a band which is far cooler than Mike Kelson's. |
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Dave Runham: Evergreen Dave is still sprightly in the field,
lively with the bat and a jolly good fellow in the pub after the
game. Not bad for a man of 104. |
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Tameem Shaik: A new player for 2011, all-rounder Tameem
recently decided to move from sunny southern India to the rather
damper conditions of Orpington. After displaying some wizardry
in the nets he was immediately conjured up to display his skills
in the 1st XI. |
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Ross Sinnema: South-African born paceman Ross is an
energetic presence in the field, wearing out opponents and
team-mates alike with his enthusiastic sledging. A chef by
trade, his annual tea is always a much-anticipated event. Ross
won the fielding award and tour award in 2010. |
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Mick Stanger: Mick was one of the club's top players in the
1970s, but then went missing for 25 years before making an
unlikely comeback. Now principally a batsman, he has taken on
responsibility as vice-captain of the 3rd XI. Mick is known for
his love of Bromley FC and for spending a lot of time on public
transport. |
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Tom Stedman: Up-and-coming youngster Tom is part of a
generation that has grown up watching Shane Warne bowl, and he
imitates the Aussie with his own big turning spin bowling. Now
he just has to work on the pie-eating and text messaging skills. |
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Danny Thomas: The mouthy Welshman is a legend in his own
lunchtime, leading the Cudham attack with his bowling and
also maintaining the ground. Well known for his pants fetish and
for keeping the Cudham boundary nice and big to preserve his
bowling figures. |
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Joe Thomas: A promising swing bowler, Thomas Junior went off
the rails in 2010 as his rock & roll lifestyle and frequent
hairstyle changes interfered with his cricket. The management
will be looking for a more disciplined approach from him this
year. |
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Chris Vaughan: A fast improving batsman with a classical
technique, Chris is renowned for his livewire fielding and
enthusiasm for the game. His only low point of 2011 came on tour
when he did more boozing and snoozing than batting. |
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Anand Venkataraman: Anand's whippy bowling picked up 46
wickets in his debut season in 2009 to give him the bowling
award. Despite a quieter 2010 he is still a key man in the team, and
has shown his commitment to the club by turning out every week
despite living in Canary Wharf. |
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Pete Wallder: Thespian Pete brings a theatrical presence to
the Cudham cricket field, whether it is with his flamboyant
batting or wily off-spin. However, Pete is perhaps best known
for his late-night exploits on tour and for his notorious
speeches at club dinners. |